"...That Ye May Be."

"Dear Sister Breinholt:

You are hereby called to serve as a missionary of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.

You have been recommended as one worthy to represent the Lord as a minister of the restored gospel ofJesus Christ. You will be an official representative of the Church. As such, you will be expected to honor the covenants you have made with Heavenly Father, keep the commandments, maintain the highest standards of conduct, and follow the righteous counsel of your mission president. As you devote your time and attention to serving the Lord, leaving behind all other personal affairs, you will be blessed with increased knowledge and testimony of Jesus Christ and His restored gospel.

Your purpose will be to invite others to come unto Christ by helping them receive the restored gospel through faith in Jesus Christ and His Atonement, repentance, baptism, receiving the gift of the Holy Ghost, and enduring to the end. As you serve with all your heart, might, mind, and strength, the Lord will lead you to those who will hear His message. They, too, can then have the opportunity to receive sacred ordinances and

make covenants with Heavenly Father.

You are assigned to labor in the 

England Manchester Mission

Our Heavenly Father will reward you for the goodness of your life. Greater blessings and more joy than you have yet experienced await you as you humbly and prayerfully serve the Lord in this labor of love among His children. We place our confidence in you and pray that the Lord will help you become an effective missionary."

A year ago i got my mission call. This is a day i will never forget. It was a day i had anticipated for a long time. 

I had always planned on serving a mission. I always knew it was something i needed to do. 

But, i wouldve never planned what i had to endure leading up to this significant moment. 

At the time i received my mission call i was probably at one of the lowest points in my life. 

Not many people know but i was going to therapy a couple times a week for various things. This was really hard for me. I was so indenial that i needed help. It was the first time in my life where i felt like i had no control. How could i possibly help others come closer to christ and change their lives when i couldn't even help myself? I found myself in a tender relationship with my heavenly father. I still in moments had a hard time trusting him. My faith was still wavering even though on the outside i tried to portray someone who had it all together and knew what she was doing. I didnt. But, there was just something inside of me that just said to keep going forward. 

I will never forget getting the message i could view my mission call. I remember tears instantly coming to my eyes and kneeling on the floor of my room pleading with heavenly father to help me to know that this is what i needed. 

What i needed to heal me. 

To guide me. 

To help me overcome what was hurting me so bad. 

Theres nothing more special than being surrounded by people who have been with you every step of the way. The people who showed up for me in the moments i didnt think i could do it. My family were the only ones who truly knew the obstacles i had been facing. So to stand in front of them and read these words to them meant the world to me. They had carried me. They had taught me. They loved me even in the moments i felt like i was unlovable. They continued to see past the mistakes and saw me for the person i was, standing in front of them, reading the words that would change my life. 

"You are called to serve in the 

England Manchester Mission." 

The place that has changed me. 

My invitation to change. 

One year later Heavenly Father has answered the prayer of the broken 18 year old on her bedroom floor. 

He knew what i needed. He already knew the plan. He knew the trials and heartache i was going to have to endure to be able to survive here. 

The experiences i was going to need to be able to bring precious souls back to him. 

I wouldnt trade it for anything. 

I would do over and over and over again if i knew i would be able to relive the experiences i have had here in england. 

I have truly come to the understanding of what the saviour says, "Come unto me, all ye that labour and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest."

There are been so many moments in my labouring as a missionary that i found myself heavy laden. 

But it has been in those moments where i have learned to find rest in my saviour. 

Training a new missionary has been one of the things on my mission that has brought on a lot of weight. Theres been so many nights where i find myself laying wide awake just thinking. Thinking about all the moments i couldve been better or the moments i forgot to do something. So many moments of just feeling so inadequate for this call i have to train sister Mkhwanazi. But it has been in the heat of those moments the saviour comes and brings me rest. Over and over again throughout the week he has continued to reassure me that i am doing enough and that i am helping her. 

This has been a time in my mission where i have solely had to rely on the saviour. I wake up every morning just pleading for strength to do another day. To be able to help her. And the saviour is delivering! She is learning and growing. Her testimony is changing people. Her confidence is growing. My heart is continuing to change. 

"...that ye may be."

There are so many times i wish i could've told myself to just hold on. To be with him. To see him. But i also know that the lord needed me to wait to learn. He need to prepare me to be. I have truly seen that all things have worked together for my good. 

I know he walks with each of us. I know this because he has found me, taken me by the hand, and has said, "come follow me."

"...that ye may be" who i need you to be. 

I know that i am who he needs me to be. That over the course of this last year he has been teaching me, helping me, and healing me to become. 

So what have i become?

I have become a witness. 

A witness of him and his perfection. 

A witness of his atonement. His atonement is real. It works. It has saved me and has allowed me to be lifted up out of my low places. 

I cant even fathom my life without him. He continues to make the impossible possible. He leads and guides. His patient care is there and waiting for us to take hold of. 

His gospel is true. 

Jesus will come. 

He will meet us where we are. 

He will enter into our stories and help us find the way back home. 

It's what Jesus does best. 

When he find us he doesnt intend to leave us where we are. 

Through grace, he offers to take us to the places we could never arrive on our own. 

I love you all! I pray for you! 

Let him enter into your story. 

With love,

Sister B.