Breinholt, Bella P

I thought a lot about Christ and his final moments this week.  Especially where his final steps were taken.  It all began in that upper room.  One last word.  A way to remember his body and blood was given there.  "My time is at hand" he says.  Because soon one of his greatest friends would quickly forget and betray him.  Thats where that long & painful walk began.  In that upper room.  Down to that low place.  Gethsemane.  His low place.  His place of pain and suffering.  The place where the weight of the world would fall upon his shoulders and cause him to bleed from every pore.   I have found myself walking.  Up and down the streets of this beautiful place i have come to call home.  As i walked for the last time, The words of this song began to fill my mind.  "Jesus climbed the hill to the Garden still;  His steps were heavy and slow." "Love and a prayer took Him there to the place only...

"When do you feel like it all changed for you?" My mom asked.  I remember the exact day and time. But before that day i had a very significant interaction with my mission president.  It was my first interview with him. I will never forget the words that he shared with me on that cold October day.  "If there is one thing i want you to be able to say when you leave is that you learned what it means to rely on the Saviour in everything that you do for him."  I soon learned what he meant.  I learned that missions are hard.   That without the Saviour they become impossible.  But with the Saviour, you are changed forever.  I remember the exact day and time when it all changed. Months had passed.  It was the 19th of February @ 9:45 am.  Almost 1 year ago.  I was struggling.  The honeymoon phase had now passed.  My mind was uneasy.  My heart was broken.  The last thing i wanted to do was rely on him. Where was he? J...

Ruth asked me this week what the greatest lesson i have learned over the course of my mission was.  Instantly the words of Nephi came to my mind.  "I know that he loveth his children." That truth became so apparent this week as I went about doing the work of the Lord.  His love became so evident & tangible.  His love came on Monday at lunch time.  After we planned we headed out to lunch with all the sisters. As we walked in the worker took us aside and said that we could pick anything on the menu and he would give it to us for free.  We were all taken back.  We couldnt believe what we just heard.  Soon after he came back out with bags of food.  More than we would have ever chose ourselves.  As he handed me the bags of food he said,  "You dont remember me do you?"  "Remember that day on the bus where you taught me and my daughter about Jesus Christ?" Andrei.  How could i forget Andrei?  Andrei was the first person ...

It was another beautiful week.  I feel like Heavenly Father is being so gracious to me, especially right now.  I feel that he is giving me so many opportunities to experience him.  The grace that is being extended each day is so much more apparent than it has been before.  Maybe because i feel like he is refining me more than he ever has before.  I feel that lately Heavenly Father has been reminding me of my journey through bringing to my remembrance the many times his grace has shined through and saved me.  A fresh start.  No tracks behind but rather a beautiful path ahead.  I often wonder how this has all been made possible.  How one who was so obliviously lost and broken could be transformed.  How could it be possible?  Why is there someone who cares so deeply for us to change?  How is he so aware even when we arent?  My learning this week began with the women at the well.  A story i often turn to for reassurance....

It felt like I was taken on a journey this week.  A journey full of many emotions.  It seemed as each day passed by the days became more full of tears.  I guess im finding that these moments on my mission mean a lot more to me than i thought.  And im finding that through each tear in those quiet moments.  Its been a lot harder than i anticipated.  The end coming near.  As i sat in that quiet chapel.  Beginning that final gathering with so many missionaries i have grown to love.  Remembering the many moments before where i sat in this chapel and experienced my Saviour.  Listening to my dear Mission President and his wife bear their witness of the Saviour.  As we stood and sang the song we always sing.  "Let us all press on in the work of the Lord..." As tears rolled down my face i began to see.  To really see the journey i have been on.  The many months. Looking into the eyes of my sweet sisters.  Oh how beautiful...